


fire and blood

by neon_sunsets



Category: Hades (Video Game 2018)
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Canon Compliant, Fluff and Angst, For the most part, Hades (Video Game 2018) Spoilers, M/M, POV Thanatos (Hades Video Game), Past Megaera/Zagreus (Hades Video Game), honestly fuck sisyphus all my homies hate sisyphus, is this just a character study loosely disguised as prose? yes, mild bastardization of greek myth
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-03
Updated: 2021-02-03
Packaged: 2021-03-14 06:40:43
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,368
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29166597
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/neon_sunsets/pseuds/neon_sunsets
Summary: All he wanted was for the pain to stop. All he wanted was to please the Lord Hades, to ease the Queen's suffering.It seems, instead, that he's prolonged it.Or: Thanatos learns some things about love, fire, and the will of the Fates.
Relationships: Thanatos/Zagreus (Hades Video Game)
Comments: 2
Kudos: 81





	fire and blood

**Author's Note:**

> okay look here's the thing i haven't finished a prose piece in god knows how long but hades has grabbed my neurodivergent ass right in the hyperfixation and now i have 103 hours on it and thanatos won't let me give him any ambrosia help
> 
> tw for canon-typical violence, blood mention, major character death technically but it's zag so he's fine, and cw for true ending spoilers (not the epilogue) 
> 
> mega super thanks to my betas, aziria and iamthemaestro - together, we are clown to clown communication
> 
> okay final note i know that canonically nyx is the one who brings zagreus back, but come on he died than absolutely had something to do with it

Thanatos has been around for a very long time, but he still remembers how he came into his godhood. How Zagreus bled to earn his. 

It’s hard not to. The pain of fire coursing through his veins, a series of deaths, each one a new breed of agony, the time he spent pushing his emotions to the pit of his stomach — none of that is easy to forget, even now, when he has finally found his peace. He doubts Zagreus has forgotten, either. 

They’re lying on their backs in Elysium, content on the cool stone of a found glade. Zagreus runs his hands along the freshly placed laurels in his hair. Thanatos surprises himself when he laughs. 

“My love,” he whispers, into the top of Zagreus’ head. He can feel Zagreus smile, burying his face into the crook of Thanatos’ neck. 

And, just for a second, he _remembers_. 

Because Thanatos’ godhood started with his love for Zagreus — as have many things since. 

////

If the Queen were here, this day would be joyous. 

But Persephone is gone. The House is quiet. The shade Achilles keeps a silent watch at his new post. Thanatos can tell that he, too, knows Death. 

Mother Nyx allows him to approach the bassinet where the Prince sleeps, just to look. He wouldn’t dare touch — it’s too great a risk. The Lord Hades would be furious if he saw Thanatos anywhere near his son.

If Hades knew what Thanatos had done. 

(He _must_ know.) 

The Prince — Zagreus, as he is to be named — is small, as infants are wont to be. His skin glows warm, with an undertone completely unlike the Chthonic gods occupying the house. Thanatos may still be young, but he has heard the rumors of Queen Persephone’s parentage. He only hopes the Prince can escape the inevitable oblivion to which all mortals are consigned. 

The Prince opens his eyes, and Thanatos can see that they are two completely different colors. 

He steps back. 

A good choice, too, as the Lord Hades has arrived. He enters the room quietly, but his presence fills the space all the same. 

Thanatos remembers the agony, and he cannot meet his eyes. 

Mother Nyx had told him that his job as Death was to be impartial. Inevitable. To serve no master other than the will of the Fates. 

And yet. 

With a loud gong, the Fates appear. 

The Lord Hades bows his head, and all those in attendance do the same. Not one of them wants to displease Klotho, Lachesis, or Atropos, and for good reason. Thanatos hopes, rather foolishly, that they cannot see what he has done. 

It’s a pointless effort, of course. They know all. 

Klotho meets his eye, expression somewhere between curiosity and contentment. She knows, clearly, but does not _seem_ angry. That gives Thanatos no comfort — looks can be deceiving.

She steps forward, then, leans down. Brushes a lock of hair out of his eye, much like Mother Nyx would. 

“You understand more than you think,” she says, then stands up, eye level with Nyx. Her sisters follow her gaze. 

“Mother Night,” they say in unison. “Lord Hades. We have arrived to deliver the Fated List.”

“Please, my daughters, deliver it,” says Nyx, seemingly unconcerned with Thanatos’ inner turmoil. 

Lachesis summons a scroll and begins to read. 

Most of it means nothing to Thanatos, nor to the others in attendance. It will all be revealed, he supposes, in time. 

The Prince is destined for many things, it seems. He shall, apparently, aid many beings, forge a bond undying, and … break free of the realm in which he was born. 

Oh no. 

Thanatos can feel the Lord Hades’ anger as if it’s heat, radiating outward from the center of the room and causing him to wince. 

This is all his fault. All he wanted was for the pain to stop. All he wanted was to please the Lord Hades, to ease the Queen’s suffering. 

It seems, instead, that he’s prolonged it. 

“That will do, Fates. Thank you,” says Hades, but there is no sincerity in his words. Mother Nyx hands him two laurel leaves, which Thanatos knows will grow into a crown as the Prince ages, and he walks over to the bassinet. “Henceforth, you shall be known as Prince Zagreus, Heir Apparent to the House of Hades.” 

The laurels are placed. The Fates nod. It is silent. 

Then, with another gong, they disappear. Silently, the Lord Hades leaves the room. 

Thanatos cannot help it. As soon as Hades leaves, he disappears. 

////

Mother Nyx finds him, later. 

He’s somewhere in the bowels of Tartarus, in a chamber with a large fountain. He knows that time has passed, but he does not know how much. 

“My son,” she says, and Thanatos wants to cry. 

“Mother, I am sorry for my wrongdoing. If I had not — had not — I —” 

“Shh, my child. The Fates are not displeased. I have reason to believe that your actions were their will.”

“But they had decreed —”

“Their will is not always set in stone, Thanatos. Perhaps they once felt that Lord Hades would not be able to have an heir, but things can change.” 

And — he knows, then, that she is right. He remembers Klotho’s gaze. Not kind, but not malicious either. His actions were neither good nor evil. They were simply preordained. 

“Still. It was disobedient for me to — to —”

“To resurrect the dead Prince? Perhaps. But I have faith in who you will grow to be, Thanatos. I believe you made the right choice.”

“I … I wanted the pain to stop. I wanted Lord Hades and the Queen to be happy.”

Nyx smiles softly. 

“They will be, someday. Here, I have something for you.” She pulls an object out of her robes. 

It’s a small stuffed mouse, with yellow ears and a purple nose. Thanatos reaches for it on instinct, pulls it close to his chest. 

“His name is Mort,” says Nyx. “ He will be your companion.”

////

It seems like no time at all before Zagreus is the same size as Thanatos. Perhaps it is — gods grow at different rates. 

At some point, they become friends. Most of their time gets spent together, running around the House, playing games, and, as they grow older, training and learning together. Nyx gives them academic lessons. Achilles trains them in the art of combat, though he is … wary, perhaps, around Thanatos. 

Thanatos does not blame him. 

The older he gets, the more he understands what Death is to mortals. Their lives are so short, so full of pain, but also full of joy. He is glad, he thinks, that he will someday bring them peace. 

He is acutely aware that the Lord Hades does not appreciate his son. More often than not, they fight, though Zagreus is but an adolescent and Hades has eons of existence and an entire domain under his heel. Thanatos understands, now, what it means to be a shoulder to cry on. 

The things Thanatos feels for Zagreus confuse him, even now, as he reaches his physical maturity. They are friends, yes, but Thanatos isn’t even sure what that means. Zagreus speaks, and Thanatos cannot help but listen. Wherever he goes, Thanatos feels compelled to follow. He would go anywhere with Zagreus. 

And he’s not sure if this is friendship — he barely knows what to call it, if he’s being honest. 

Whatever it is, though … he’s content. 

////

And then, in an instant, everything falls apart. 

They’re fully grown, and Thanatos’ fated purpose looms over his head like a low-hanging ceiling. He knows that as soon as he comes into his godhood, he’ll have to begin his work. 

But it hasn’t happened yet. So he and Zagreus talk, and spar, and spend time pretending that things will never have to change. 

Achilles has taken to summoning wretches for them to fight, holding competitions to see who can get more kills. It’s not hard for Thanatos to best Zagreus — Stygius is a formidable weapon, but it pales in comparison to the instrument of Death that is Thanatos’ scythe. Despite this, Zagreus usually does well. 

Today, though, he is lagging. 

And he does not see the wretch. 

Thanatos whips his head around towards the direction of the shout and sees Zagreus crumpled on the ground, blood as red as his laurels pooling around him. 

He feels it, then. That old fire. 

It sears his veins, ripping through his lungs. He cannot breathe. His vision goes black, then a bright green. He feels himself lifting off the ground. 

For the first time in centuries, that golden thread appears. 

There’s a knot at the end, small enough that he almost glances over it. He remembers how hard it had been to tie, how it had slipped repeatedly through his fingers. 

The break is smaller this time. It starts to patch itself before Thanatos has even touched it. He tries, but he cannot seem to reach. 

His vision clears. Zagreus is crouching, holding his chest in pain, but he’s _alive_. Achilles stares at Thanatos from where he’s comforting the Prince. 

Nyx appears with a rush of air, concern etched on her face. 

(Later, much later, Zagreus will tell him what he saw. How Thanatos shone so brightly it was almost blinding, how filigree wings made of pure green light held him up against the backdrop of a thousand anguished souls. How he felt, then, that Thanatos was no longer his to hold. How wrong he had been.)

And Thanatos knows, in his slowly sinking heart, that it is time for him to go. 

////

It’s been many years since his last visit to the House. His job was overwhelming, at first, and he was barely able to keep up. But as he figured out speed and efficiency, gained the help of his brother Charon and the psychopomp Hermes, it got easier. 

Now, he is back. And he wishes, more than anything, to see Zagreus, though he only has a small amount of time. 

The first thing, of course, is to deliver his report to the Lord Hades. It goes surprisingly well — his Master is pleased with his job performance. 

He floats over to his mother, next. Accepts her embrace. Tells her he is well. 

Thanatos greets Hypnos after that, and notices that he seems to have reached his own godhood. They chat briefly. 

“If you’re looking for Zagreus,” says Hypnos, eventually, “you should check the administration chambers. But, uh, be careful? He’s been getting into fights with Lord Hades lately.”

Thanatos thanks his brother, floats into the West hall. He nods to Achilles, whose previous melancholy seems to have leveled out into a kind of forced apathy. 

As soon as he enters the administration chambers, he hears Zagreus shout, “Than!” and is almost immediately pulled into a tight embrace. He forgets himself, for a second, and leans into it. 

“Zagreus,” Thanatos says, when they pull apart. “How have you been?”

He sighs, loudly. “Father has tasked me with administrative duties which he has neglected to explain. I don’t understand them, so I fail repeatedly. He gets angry at me for not doing a good job. We fight, the whole house is miserable. What about you?”

It’s clear he doesn’t want to say anything further, so Thanatos doesn’t press. 

“I’ve been … busy. Mortals die constantly, so.” His voice is drier than he intended. When was the last time he spoke more than a few passing words?

“Evidently so. You’ve been gone for so long, Than. Do you have some time to talk?”

And — no, not really. He’s reached the end of his break. But he’ll make time for Zagreus anyways, because he has always been weak. 

////

It seems that each time Thanatos returns, the situation grows worse. Admittedly, his visits are sparse - when he does spend time in the House, he’s either giving reports or talking with Zagreus. The Lord Hades has become openly hostile towards his son, a development that is strange, even knowing his usual temper. Thanatos vows that he will not take sides. He cannot allow his loyalty to become conditional. 

At some point, he hears that Zagreus and the Fury Megaera have begun a relationship. 

Thanatos tells himself it doesn’t bother him. Though he doesn’t really know Megaera, he’s sure she’ll be good for Zagreus. He’s happy, and that’s all that matters. Thanatos is not destined for such things. 

And if he sometimes thinks about Zagreus’ bond undying, and if he sometimes wishes it would be him, well —

That’s not a bias. It’s just the remnants of a long-dead childhood dream, bits of his own personal Titans chopped up and scattered throughout his heart. 

////

Sometimes, the Fates are cruel. 

He cannot collect every mortal. This has always been true. Ares takes those who die violently. Hermes and Charon help Thanatos with the gentle deaths, shades who come in far greater numbers. 

Even so, most mortals go alone, or sometimes in groups. For the most part, Thanatos does not make personal trips. 

But Hermes dashes by him with a message, one day, a scroll from Zeus himself. The instructions are clear: _Imprison the King of Ephyra, Sisyphus, in the depths of Tartarus._

Thanatos sighs, summons chains. It’s been a while, but he remembers enough to know that they are volatile things, so he handles them carefully. 

The king has died in a ceremonial chamber, as it would seem; mourners surround him on all sides. Thanatos has seen enough death to know that they are not here by choice. 

Sisyphus’ shade sits on a dais next to his body, brow furrowed in thought. 

“You are King Sisyphus of Ephyra?” Thanatos asks. 

“Yes, I am. Though … it does not seem you are the boatman, Charon, as I see no oar. Who might you be?”

Thanatos raises his eyebrows, keeps his voice even. “I am Thanatos, God of Death. I have come to bring you to Tartarus, where you will be chained for eternity.”

“I see. Are those the chains?” 

Thanatos nods. “Yes.”

“How do they work?”

Thanatos knows how the chains can be. He knows that Sisyphus is cruel, murderous, known far and wide for his trickery. But he trusts that the king will accept his Fate-ordained punishment. Death is inevitable, even for the damned. What would be the point in trying to cheat it? 

So, like a fool, Thanatos shows him how they work, closing one cuff around his wrist in demonstration. 

Sisyphus pushes him back. And then, in an instant, he is bound. 

The pain is immediately overwhelming. Thanatos howls, overcome by agony. He hears the call of other souls, those who are marked by the Fates for his collection. Wonders, briefly, if anyone will look for him. At some point, Sisyphus disappears - having cheated Death, he may very well be alive somewhere. Thanatos cannot fathom how much time passes. 

And Thanatos thinks, through the haze of pain, of Zagreus’ mortality — and wonders if he, too, can die. 

////

When Lord Ares shows up, Thanatos is not grateful. 

He’s just tired. Betrayal sits bitterly in his chest. 

Ares cleaves through the chains with two well-placed arcs of his sword. Thanatos stands, grips his scythe until the hilt digs into his palm. 

They find Sisyphus together, in perfect silence. Thanatos does not strike him down, but instead drags him — almost like drowning, pulling him into the depths of the Styx. 

When they arrive at the House, all is quiet. Lord Hades’ anger is searing, but it is mercifully not directed at Thanatos. He does not think he could take more guilt. 

Megaera is summoned, and together, they derive an appropriate punishment for the knave-king. Rolling a boulder up a hill for eternity might not sound like a particularly torturous existence, but being excessively cruel has never been Thanatos’ way. In a sense, Sisyphus has bested him. A more violent punishment would not change that. 

He’s so exhausted that for once, he sleeps, and does not care if he dreams of unreachable things. 

////

Eventually, Zagreus and Megaera’s relationship ends. 

Thanatos does not feel relief, per se. He is disappointed for them, does his best to comfort both of them — he shares a drink with Megaera, holds Zagreus as he cries on his shoulder. 

Traitorously, the pieces of his childhood fantasies begin to stitch themselves back together. 

Now that Zagreus does not have Megaera to confide in, to vent his frustrations to, his relationship with his father gets worse. Thanatos tries to return more often than usual, makes an effort to be there, until — until he can’t, anymore, because Lord Ares has gone nearly a century since his last war, because Lady Demeter has decided to punish the mortals for her personal tragedy. 

Because as much as he wants to, wants to spend eternity standing at Zagreus’ side, he cannot. The _want_ collecting like rainwater in his chest will never be requited. He can get by with stolen glances and short conversations, but … ultimately, he needs to work. 

At some point, the fire that he has come to associate with Zagreus returns — there, and then gone in a flash. His worry magnifies, but he pushes it down.

He cannot shirk his duties, regardless of how much he might want to. 

////

His return to the house, after a long stretch of cleaning up Olympian messes, is quiet. The air is heavy with anger. Cerberus has buried his heads in his paws, and he whines shamefully as Thanatos passes. The lounge is boarded up for repairs. 

Thanatos delivers his report quickly, and the Lord Hades dismisses him with a wave. He floats over to his mother, who stands across from the closed lounge with a knowing expression. 

“Where is Zagreus?” he asks, barely a whisper. 

“He is gone, my son. He intends to leave the Underworld and find his mother. His relatives on Olympus are aiding him. You should know, that — he has attempted several times, thus far, though he has not reached his goal. Lord Hades has placed many obstacles in his way.” 

And there’s the fire, again, burning a hole in his heart, fueled by the desire that he’s been shoving down. 

Zagreus is gone. He’s leaving. And he didn’t say _goodbye_. 

“I assume you’re helping as well?” he bites, harsher than he expected. 

“Yes, my child. He must find his own place, wherever that is.”

The anger recedes slightly, boils down to something close to bitterness. To the biting knowledge that he will never be enough for Zagreus. It reminds him of Sisyphus, the cutting edge of betrayal sharp against his throat. 

Thanatos gives his mother a curt nod and disappears. 

He ends up, once more, in a fountain chamber in Tartarus. The cool rush of the water is as close to calming as the Underworld gets, but … this chamber has blood on the floor, red staining the gray tiles. Zagreus has been here. 

If Thanatos concentrates, he can feel Zagreus’ soul, somewhere between Asphodel’s heat and the cool green of Elysium. It would seem that he’s gotten past Megaera, then, and the remains of that blasted Hydra that Hades keeps around. 

He knows, then, that he needs to talk to Zagreus. Even if it’s only to say goodbye.

////

Thanatos doesn’t make many trips to Elysium. Even so, many of the souls there were special deliveries, those great mortals favored by the gods. The ones who were important enough to warrant a personal escort. It’s only natural, then, that some fear him while others show respect. 

He follows a trail of Zagreus’ blood for a while. Shades cluster in the corners of rooms or the centers of fields. Everywhere he goes, they watch. 

As he passes, they whisper to each other. _Who were you_ , they ask, _before him? What did you live for?_

And — 

And he knows they’re not asking him about Zagreus. Their existence is defined by their life and by their death. They do not whisper of eternal, unrequited love — they gossip about greatness, clamor for recognition of their achievements. 

But it stings that he can no longer remember a time before Zagreus. What will become of Thanatos when Zagreus leaves?

He feels Zagreus’ soul, just a few chambers ahead. With a loud gong, Thanatos appears in front of him.

“Thought you could just get away from me, did you?”

////

Somehow, saying goodbye makes Thanatos feel worse. 

He knows, as soon as he arrives back at the house, that he’s going to end up helping Zagreus. It’s a risk, yes. He could lose any number of things. And if he succeeds in helping, he’ll lose the one person he loves most. 

But, above all, he wants Zagreus to be happy. And if finding his mother, if escaping the Underworld, leaving it all behind … if that is what it takes, then so be it. 

As soon as Thanatos has a break, he goes to find Zagreus. This time, he’s somewhere in Asphodel. Stygius reflects the light, coated with a red shine — Ares, probably. 

“Than! You … you’re here.”

“I don’t have much time. Let’s get this over with.”

And they’re off, entwined in a familiar dance. Zagreus slashes through foes, spearing a Splitter on his sword. He summons a Bloodstone and knocks a Bone-Raker into the magma, where it quickly meets its end. Thanatos helps where he can, sending a nest of Numbskulls to their second death and dispatching a few errant Bloodless. 

When the competition is over, Zagreus has bested him. 

Thanatos pulls out the only thing he has that will help — a preserved Centaur Heart. Zagreus takes it from him, and Thanatos turns to leave.

“Wait!” 

Thanatos looks back. 

Zagreus is holding something out. “I, uh. Wanted to give this to you. I know you’re angry, and you have a right to be. Know that I need to do this, but. I just … I miss you, Than.” 

It’s nectar. 

////

The bottles of nectar keep coming. It seems that every time Thanatos sees Zagreus, he gets one. The gesture confuses him. On the one hand, Zagreus seems to be actively trying to patch up or strengthen relationships — Megaera also received a bottle, under the condition of repairing their friendship, and Achilles had been given several. 

(According to Megaera, Zagreus wears a butterfly pin, the one Thanatos had given him in an attempt to make the nectar a fair exchange. He makes a point not to think about the fact that it’s apparently placed over his heart.

“It’s ironic how oblivious he is,” she says, when they’re sharing drinks in the lounge. “I think every shade in _Tartarus_ knows how you feel.”)

On the other hand, Zagreus is still trying to leave. He gets further and further each time — Thanatos knows for a fact that his last several attempts had only been cut short by the Satyrs in the Temple of Styx. Orpheus is back, now, and Zagreus has told Thanatos about his attempts to reunite him with Eurydice. New furniture and improvements to the House’s infrastructure keep popping up each time Thanatos returns. 

And, with each glimpse of Zagreus’ smile, each joyful shout of “Than!”, the want in his chest grows a little larger. Soon, Thanatos fears, it’ll be enough to drown out the burns from each death. He fears, because he cannot let himself hope. 

////

Eventually, it happens. 

The House is rattled by the news that Zagreus has come into his godhood. 

Thanatos knows what transpired, of course. He knows that Zagreus bested his father in combat, that he found his mother, that he reached the top of his climb only to be dragged back down in a cruel twist, hand-woven by the Fates. 

Thanatos knows, because he was the one to bring Zagreus home. 

He’s never been more conflicted. 

Yes, he’s disappointed that Zagreus cannot stay on the surface, if only because it restricts his happiness. But he also relishes the thought that Zagreus is staying. 

And he knows what Achilles thinks. That Zagreus is the god of blood, of life itself. Thanatos’ fated opposite. It’s a dangerous thought to indulge in — he is not Zagreus’ bond undying, as much he might wish to be. He is not destined for such happiness. 

But … but now, as he watches Zagreus run, watches him blow past Thanatos’ kill count in their competitions, watches him fight his father and come out victorious, again and again … 

Thanatos thinks that he can see it. 

Zagreus, God of Blood. God of _Life_. 

It’s fitting. Thanatos doesn’t think he’s ever seen anyone quite so alive. 

////

The Queen returns, and the House rejoices. By the will of the Fates, happiness is restored. 

And yet. 

Thanatos looks down at the bottle of Ambrosia in his hands, and thinks that maybe he knows nothing of the Fates at all. 

////

There are four bottles of Ambrosia on his shelf.

One of them is half empty — the first one, which he allowed himself to indulge in. The others are all full. The bottles are the only thing he’s touched in his largely unused quarters in _ages_ , unless you count Mort, who he gave to Zagreus. 

Thanatos has no idea what to do.

He knows that he loves Zagreus. That’s always been true. All things came from Chaos, Cerberus has three heads, and Thanatos is in love with Zagreus. It’s just a fact. 

And … and beyond Thanatos’ wildest hopes, it seems that Zagreus might love him in return. 

He remembers, then, what Klotho said, all those eons ago. 

_“You understand more than you think.”_

Thanatos disappears. If he goes to Zagreus’ room now, he should be able to catch him before he leaves again. 

////

There are many things that Thanatos will forget. That’s what happens when you live for eternity — memories rush by like the water of the Lethe, unable to be held for more than a short while.

But the warmth he feels, lying safe and content next to Zagreus? That, Thanatos will never forget. 

Because Zagreus has vowed to stand beside him for eternity. Because he no longer has to settle for walking a few paces behind, pushing his love down, hoping for fire to burn him whole. 

Because many things started with Thanatos’ love for Zagreus — including the beginning of his happiness.

**Author's Note:**

> every time i read the "thus they are inexorably drawn" part of the codex i have to go take a deep fucking breath lest i give in to the urge to walk into the woods and scream about soulmates


End file.
